January 2011

Sorry it has been so long since we lasted updated all of you on our status here in Brazil. December passed by quickly with all the activities associated with Christmas and New Year's.

To start off the kids got out of school for the summer in December. My job has been to work with the boys ages six on up with the farm cleanup. The farm has been overgrown with weeds and there was a lot of wood behind the barn that has needed to be chopped up for firewood. I have been working with Kevin, Sam and Steve (two short-term missionaries) and the boys to get all the wood chopped and cleaned up. We have also been rearranging and organizing the barn. It is a big job because this hasn't been done for five years. It has been hard to try to get the boys working. Many times they have sin issues with their attitude towards work. Unfortunately, when some of the boys are already 15 years old, there isn't much time to address the issue before they are outside of CLM and having to work in the to support themselves.

Katie has been taking care of Joseph which is a full time job in itself. When she has free time she tries to watch the three youngest kids in the mornings. Sometimes she will help with art lessons, or let some of the girls help her out with things around our house. Caring for Joseph is a full time job that has its challenges and rewards. Joseph isn't an easy and content baby, he is fussy and particular wants only mommy all the time. God has been using Joseph to continue to refine Katie and I.

The Christmas season came and left in a hurry. We ended up celebrating Christmas parties with the missionaries, the CLM kids, and then the Judge held a Christmas party for the kids. This all lead up to Christmas Day when the kids received gifts from the Nazarene Church in Sao Paulo. That day the missionaries cooked the meal and the kids swam all afternoon. Then New Year's Eve, Katie, Joseph, and I drove to Curitiba to pick up my parents.

My Parents were happy to see us at the airport. Joseph wasn't happy at first but now he is warming up to them. This past week we have been showing my parents around CLM, the colonies and Guarapuava.

January 5th, we left for Foz do Iguassu. The trip was going well until the car broke down outside of Causcavel. We waited at a truck stop for two hours until a tow truck came for the car, and another two hours until we were on our way for Foz do Iguassu by taxi. By God's grace our car broke down at a gas station, within 4 miles of a city that had a Peugeot dealership. We arrived at our hotel around six at night. We were exhausted but relieved to be at our destination.

The next day we awoke to find that Joseph was teething and I was sick with a fever. By God's grace our hotel did guided tours of the waterfalls so my parents were able to visit the Argentinian side of the waterfalls while Katie, Joseph and I stayed at the hotel. That night my fever broke so Friday we were able to visit the Brazilian side of the waterfalls with Joseph and my parents as well as the Itaipu dam. Our car was ready to pick up Saturday and we made it home safely Saturday afternoon.

Right now we are going through a tough time in our term. We had so many expectations about being here that didn't match reality. This has been very hard on both Katie and I. We don't know when we are coming back home for furlough but honestly we are ready to quit. It is only by relying on God's grace that we make it through each day. So please be praying with us as we are trying to seek God's will and follow him.

This struggle is also part of the reason why we haven't written since November. It is hard to write when I have been struggling with bitterness and frustration. I am sorry I am not one of the perfect missionaries that have “arrived and have it together”. I don't have it together, I am still a sinner and need to rely on our savior's grace. I have been failing as a spiritual leader to my family. I have been so busy with activities related to the ministry that I have been neglecting my intimate time with God and my spouse. I am tired and weary. Going to Church is a chore and a drudgery when I have to sit through an hour of worship songs not understanding what I am singing about, then maybe understanding the first 4 minutes of the sermon before my mind can't follow along because of the language.

I am trying to wait until December to take our furlough but I am tired and ready to quit now. I could write another four pages of my struggles here but it isn't beneficial to any one. Please be praying for us. We appreciate your prayer support during this time.